\”You find yourself refreshed by the presence of cheerful people. Why not make an honest effort to confer that pleasure on others? Half the battle is gained if you never allow yourself to say anything gloomy.\” –Julia Child, 1912-2004, Chef, Author and Television Personality What is your primary intention with others – to share uplifting, […]

We have all learned many ways of trying to avoid or get rid of our painful feelings. Many of these ways are fairly obvious: addictions to substances and activities, staying in your mind rather than in your body, or judging yourself. Another major way we avoid or try to get rid of our painful feelings […]

“It’s time for me to move on. I’ve learned so much – I just know that next time it will be better.” “Our new relationship has a great chance, because we’ve both been married before and have learned a lot. We know that this time around we will do it so much better.” Is this […]

We are inherently social beings, and feeling emotionally connected with another is one of the great joys in life. Yet, all too often, we feel lonely around another or others, wanting to connect and not knowing how. We may have learned numerous dysfunctional or unsatisfying ways of connecting, and wonder why we still feel lonely […]

All of us have projected our own thoughts, feelings, motivations and desires onto others, and have been at the other end of projection. Many of us learned to project onto others as we were growing up, when our parents, siblings or caregivers projected their unconscious feelings, thoughts and motivations onto us. We might project onto […]

In my counseling practice, I often have clients who tend to isolate as a way of protecting against their fears – especially their fears of rejection and engulfment. They are so afraid of being disliked, disapproved of, attacked or having demands made on them, that they choose to avoid relationships, rather than learn how to […]

\”Intimacy begins with oneself. It does no good to try to find intimacy with friends, lovers, and family if you are starting out from alienation and division within yourself.\” – Thomas Moore, author, Care of the Soul Most of us would love to have intimacy and connection in our lives, yet we often find this […]

This article on CNN Health – http://www.cnn.com/2011/HEALTH/08/17/bitter.resentful.ep/index.html?&hpt=hp_c2- by Elizabeth Cohen, is very interesting, regarding the negative health effects of blame and resentment. \”Feeling bitter interferes with the body\’s hormonal and immune systems, according to Carsten Wrosch, an associate professor of psychology at Concordia University in Montreal….\” \”The data that negative mental states cause heart problems […]

There is a vast difference between feeling sorry for yourself and feeling kindness toward yourself. SELF-PITY When you see yourself as a victim, you indulge in self-pity. You are a bottomless pit of misery, and you may find yourself crying endless victim tears. You might say things like: * Why do bad things always happen […]

I\’ve been reading in many different sources about the research involving community and well being. In his best-selling book, \”Outliers,\” Malcolm Gladwell opens with a study done in a small Pennsylvania town called Roseto. In 1882, Italians who lived in a town of the same name, Roseto, started to come to the U.S. These people […]